He gets to live on: NICU parents

Phillip Rock was born to Denise and Charlie Rock in 2001, 15 weeks prematurely. His life lasted only two days.

A year later, Denise conceived again, and again gave birth early. During Leighton Rock’s 35-day stay in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU), Denise and Charlie met several other parents of preemies, who could give moral support.

Three years later, Denise gave birth to another premature baby girl, Emerson, now a toddler.

The March of Dimes has started a program to formally provide support to parents of preemies. The March of Dimes NICU Family Support Program also includes an online community at ShareYourStory.org where members who have already experienced preterm labor can share information with those who have not.

Now Denise volunteers at the program’s chapter office at St. Luke’s Hospital in Kansas City, Missouri, near home in Shawnee, Kansas. "Losing a child is the worst thing that has happened in my life," she says. "There are not very many parents [who have lost a child] who get to talk about their child all the time. I say Phillip’s name every day. He gets to live on even though he’s not here….After Phillip died, I vowed not to let his birth and death be for nothing. So even if I help just one person, his life had a purpose."

Advice: Vow to carry on your family member’s spirit.

Read another of our stories about a mother patient advocate, or read Leah Ingram’s source story in the June 2007 issue of Continental.com magazine.